


I'll meet you in our dreams on your Beach

by Dream_Seeker



Category: Death Stranding (Video Games)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Real World, Anger, F/M, Gen, Loneliness, Mental Anguish, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:07:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26167630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dream_Seeker/pseuds/Dream_Seeker
Summary: Sadie lives in our world. Yes. Yours and mine.She's a Higgs-stan like most of us who love the Higgs tag here. Yet she's the lucky (?) one who's able to somehow Astral Travel and find Higgs' Beach.Definitely taking a HUGE chance against eternity:1 odds, she tries.Sadie's there.She's found him.Now what?
Relationships: Higgs Monaghan/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 5





	1. Sometimes you just gotta try.

**Author's Note:**

> Sometime my mind just...... Goes places.

Sadie played and loved Death Stranding. But what happened to Higgs Monaghan at the end of the game shattered her. Silly? Maybe to most but when empathy in a person is vast, one will even cry for Winnie the Pooh when he can't find more honey. 

It's always about putting one's self into others shoes, after all. It shows deep caring. 

She knew in her soul that anything a Human can create, exists. Even if it's a character in a book, movie, TV show - or, in this case, a video game. If something is created, it is put out into Being, and then that something exists. End of. No questions. Simple fact. Period. 

So on that reasoning, Higgs Monaghan exists. Maybe not on Sadie's Earth, but definitely on _AN_ Earth. No doubt a parallel Earth since the USA and various similarities happened between the two Earth's. They're too much alike in the past, pre-Stranding. Cliff was a Captain in the Afghanistan and Iraq Wars and those were circa 2003. Supposedly the Stranding happened roughly 85 years later. 

Something like that. 

Sadie decided to use the infinite power of Dreams, Astral Projection and Lucid Dreaming to find and make contact with Higgs. It _had_ to work since Dreams and AP took ones inner Being anywhere and any place that they know of - or can imagine - and Sadie knew the DS lands like her own USA and could _very damned well thank you very MUCH _imagine being there herself. 

She needed to and was going to find Higgs Monaghan.

He's fully alone.

He needs SOME kind of connection. 

He needs her.

He just doesn't realize it yet. 

What's the point of needing anyone 

When everyone always threw him out like trash after using him? 

Sadie's plan was to find Higgs, get his attention, then... Well, then she'd play it by ear. She didn't know how he'd react to her. He might be angry that she's there. He might be happy to see her. He might be confused and not know who she is. Which made all kinds of sense. Different Worlds and all

But Sadie has to try.

After all, if you want something or have a dream, TRY. Even if you fail, you'll never have to look back on life when you're 80 and lament the "I wonder what if.." and the "Oh if only I had" regrets and longings. 

Sadie is going to find Higgs and give it her best shot. 

She's going to find him, and try her damndest to get him out of there. 

It's a long shot, but then, as Higgs would (maybe?) say, "All's fair in love and war." 

And this is both.

Okay...... So it's love on her side and war on his but fuck.

Sides can and do come together.

Sadie knows it's all a long shot. The odds of everything are so totally against her: accessing any Beach; Finding Higgs' Beach; Finding Higgs himself; Him actually listening to her, taking her seriously, GOING with her....

Yes-sir-ree-bob, her odds were like eternity to one, but that one percent chance was still a chance.

\-----------------

Time kept on ticking.  
Time didn't exist.  
It had been a day.  
It had been 5 trillion years.  
All that _WAS_ was an unending ebb and flow of waves.  
Until even that ceased be heard.  
It became breath. The ebb and flow of eternal breathing, when breathing should have ended millenia ago...  
There was no time.  
There just IS.  
He slowly blinked.  
The action took a trillion years of a second.

A toe twitched.  
It felt like the Beach heaved up from that small minute motion alone.

He remained as he'd fell the final time ago, eyes gazing through the sky above, seeing all. Seeing nothing. 

_"............... Higgs....."_

His breath caught in his throat for a moment, disrupting that rhythmic ebb and flow. 

Higgs blinked once. Twice.

He realized it was bullshit. His mind playing fucked up games like it would do every few million years. 

_"........... where are you........ Higgs......."_

A faint whisper over the still air. 

He blinked again, eyes now focusing on the sky above. 

_"........... Need to find you, Higgs........"_

His head slowly fell to one side toward the voice, his temple and ear now laying in the sand. Unused joints crack and to Higgs it was as if the sound was amplified a millionfold and he winced. 

_"............ please..... Higgs...... connect....... "_

Leathery lips parted, the sides of his mouth cracked open after long disuse, dryer than the sand below him which had molded around his still body.

The only embrace allowed him. 

"......... here...... I'm...." 

He could barely hear himself. He raised a hand, wet from the water, and ran his finger over his lips. 

The salt stung. 

The first pain he had felt since never. 

"Here...." He tried to call on cracking vocal cords. It came out as a whimper. 

His strength. He used to be strong. A god. Infallible. Until he wasn't. But he had strength. 

He opened his mouth wider and called forth all his strength left and let out all he had, voice giving it all as the pain, defeat and loneliness fully embraced his shout, 

"HERE! I'M HERE! I'M HERE!!" 

He fell back, breathing heavily, his lungs and throat on fire. 

"..... _please_....." He whispered, as his head returned to its normal position, staring up at a starless and colorless sky above. 

\---------------------------

"... I'M HERE..... _please_.... "

She woke up with a start, sitting bolt upright in her bed, eyes wide. 

"H... Higgs?" she said, looking around the dark room. She was in her bed, at home. Alone. Yet she knew her long foray into Astral Projection had finally paid off. Though it had been a weak, faint voice, she'd know it anywhere.

Yet... what it had just been another normal dream? Lord knew she'd had tons of those. It hadn't been easy learning how to AP and it'd taken at least 7 months to have her first one, and it had been so shocking that she'd slammed back into her body immediately upon realizing _it had fucking worked_ and woke right up.

Nothing good came easy. She never gave up though. A few times she'd found her self on a beach and didn't know if it was wishful thinking sneaking into her non AP dreams but Sadie still looked at it as a win. When 'a few times' turned into 'more and more often', she knew she had achieved a big step in her goals. 

There had been an emotional and mental difference to every one of the beaches she'd dream-walked. After a while, she would have sworn she could tell by the... feel... the ambience of a beach if it was, well, Higgs. Like, she'd obviously hadn't known him in person aside from the game, but no beach she'd been to felt like how she imagined it'd be. 

Some Beaches were inviting. Some smelled sweet. Some decrepit. Some had varied colors brightening the entire Beach far as the eye could see, and those colors were of an ilk that Sadie's world could never comprehend. One Beach felt malevolent and she'd been violently thrown out of the Beach by something more anciently powerful than she could imagine. She had woken up screaming, her chest heaving up and down from the power of her terrified breaths, body covered in sweat. 

Hideo Kojima did an amazing job with DS. But holy fuck the artists were way off regarding BT's. 

Way. The. Fuck. Off. 

Sadie never ever ever EVER wanted to see another BT never ever ever EVER again. 

She'd just know the Beaches were not the one Higgs was exiled to - until last night.. er... just a few minutes back. The Beach was dark. More than lonely. Desolate. Felt like a prison. An eternal sentence. Doom. Defeat. Hopelessness. Loss. Lethargy. Still and calm, but not in a peaceful way. 

Sadie had called out Higgs' name a few times and was ready to move to another part of the Beach when she'd actually heard a distant reply. 

_It was Higgs' voice_. 

She had to get back. Right now. 

As the girl yawned and stretched her arms out as far as they could go, she set her intentions back on the Beach, visualizing Higgs Monaghan, then curled up and fell back to sleep.


	2. Stranding

She opened her eyes, finding herself back on the same dark beach, under the same dark sky. Feeling the same desolation, doom, sorrow, anger.

But there was something else under it all. 

"Higgs!" she called out, and heard her voice echo across the shoreline and off into the distance. 

"HIGGS!" she yelled again, a lot louder this time. Again and again she yelled his name as she walked along the shoreline, eyes ever scanning, mind a constant visualizion of the man she sought. 

_".... here.... Please..... I'm... here_.." she heard faintly from not too far away, " _Please_.... " 

"HIGGS!" Sadie broke into a run, leaping small boulders and weaving around larger ones, taking time to search behind every one.

When she passed a dead Whale-Seahorse thing, her nose turned up - and then she drew to a stop, staring ahead. 

There, lying prone in the sand, was a figure all in black.

"HIGGS!!!!" Sadie screamed and ran towards the man, pushing herself to run harder than she ever had in her life. As she drew up next to him, she dropped onto the sand at his side, arms on either side of his chest and just stared down at him.

".... who.... " Higgs both tried to speak and raise his arm but he had no strength, Sadie saw. Instead, she reached down, took his hand in hers and could only stare, locked into ice blue eyes she'd only seen from a monitor before.

"Higgs... my god..." Was all she could muster before (gently) dropped onto his chest, slid her arm around him and began to weep.

A little time passed and Sadie felt an arm move around her middle back. 

She heard an intake of breath and then a soft sob. 

\-----------

"I'm sorry...." Higgs whispered, voice catching and cracking around his soft sobbing, "I'm so sorry.... I'm so sorry... "

"Shhhhhhh, Higgs." Sadie pressed her cheek against his chest, hearing his heartbeat. "You're forgiven, Higgs. You're forgiven..."

"I never thought...." He tried to speak more but his voice was overridden by his sobbing which had grown stronger. All he could do was let her hand go and move it around her back and cling to Sadie, craving Human contact. 

"I know. It's okay, Higgs.... Sweet Higgs....It's all in the past." She whispered, reaching up with her now free hand to gently wipe his tears off his cheek.

They laid like that for an unknown amount of time. 

* * *

"I'm sorry...." He whispered again, "I'm so sorry...."

"Shhhhhhh, Higgs. It's all right."

"It's not all right. I hurt you. I hurt you so badly. A-and so many others... "

"Yes you did. But it's in the past now. It doesn't matter anymore." Sadie softly soothed. She knew Higgs was in a sense speaking to every single person in the game - no. In HIS reality - as he apologized about hurting her. 

Higgs just kept repeating "I'm so sorry..." over and over again, as if he was stuck on a loop. He no doubt had had those words constantly slamming through his mind since his exile.

"You don't have to keep apologizing, Higgs. I already forgave you." She whispered, kissing his cheek.

"I hurt you so badly..."

"Hush now. It's all in the past." 

"I hate myself for what I did to you. You didn't deserve it."

"You didn't deserve this horrific torture as punishment, Higgs. Please... Look at me... " Sadie gently implored as she gently traced her fingertips over his cheek, slightly raising up so he could see her. 

"Don't let go... Don't move..." Higgs whimpered as he tried to tighten his arms around her, so she lowered her head back down to his chest. 

Fuck, he was so...broken....

"I just need you to know that I'm so sorry. I really am." He whispered.

"I know you are, Higgs. And I forgive you." 

She raised her head, softly kissed him on the cheek and he turned his head towards her, trying to move his body closer to her own. 

"Don't let go.... _Please_..." He whimpered. 

Sadie didn't want to let go either, but she knew she would have to at some point when her body was close to waking. She dreaded that moment. 

Fuck, even when she'd return to him the coming night, losing her contact in the meantime would probably drive Higgs insane or shatter him worse than he already was.

"I-- I have to let go soon, Higgs. But I'll be back tonight, I promise." Sadie reluctantly whispered. 

  
Higgs didn't want her to. He didn't want her to leave. He didn't want her to let go. He didn't want her to stop holding him. He didn't want to let go either. _"No ..."_

"Higgs, I promise you with every cell in my body that I WILL be back. When I sleep I will be back. I finally found you. I am not losing you or leaving you. Can we ...make a strand between us?" 

He met her eyes and studied her. Finally he gave a little nod. "Promise you'll return. Please. _Please_." 

"I _promise_ , Higgs Monaghan. I-I've loved you for a long time now and I am NOT losing you." She softly admitted and he searched her eyes deeply. 

"Higgs. I don't have much time. How do we make a strong Strand between us? It'll always bring me to you. Please tell me. We can create it right now."

"Are you... _sure_ you want a Strand with me...?" Higgs softly asked, eyes never leaving hers and Sadie nodded, "With all my heart and soul. You don't know yet what all I've done and how long I've worked to find you. Higgs.... We need to connect. We _need_ to create this strand. Please."

He was quiet for a few moments and then nodded. 

With a groan from the exertion, Higgs slowly sat up, reluctantly losing the contact with Sadie, and then he looked around, taking in the scenery. "First time I've sat up in forever..." He reached behind him, felt around, and nodded as he brought his chiral knife out. 

"You're certain? Heh.... I don't even know your name..." He mused as he reached out, running a lightly shaking finger down her arm. 

"Sadie MacLeod." Was her reply and Higgs held her hand once his finger had arrived. 

"Well, Sadie MacLeod. To create a Strand, there needs to be a bond. The stronger the bond, the stronger the Strand. The bond can be between siblings - any family member with a strong relationship - if someone saves another's life, love, a kiss shared between lovers, a blood bond - literal blood," Higgs lightly shook his blade, "and the most powerful strand - sex between lovers."

"Are those in order from lightest bond to strongest?" Sadie asked and Higgs nodded. 

"Yes."

"Blood bond. That IS strong." 

"Can never be severed as blood flows through the body. So that's why it's the second most powerful and strongest Strand." Higgs softly said, letting out a fit of coughing. "Mouth's not used to talking..sorry. But sex is THE strongest because, though it's similar to the blood bond, it's the most intimate and the most.... It's a sharing of love, desire, need, being selfless and giving, full trust, full openess, vulnerability... but it's not as if sex with anyone will make the kind of bond required to create the Strand. It's more involved than that."

Sadie nodded in agreement. "Makes sense. Can any of those be combined to make a stronger Strand?" 

Higgs let a small smile touch his lips, "Yes, of course."

She was about to reply when she felt less... there. "Higgs, it has to be done quickly. I'm about to wake where I'm at. I'll explain tonight when I'm back." 

He paused, then made a cut on his palm, turned Sadie's hand palm side up and made the same cut and them pressed their hands tightly together, their eyes locked deeply. 

Sadie felt something seem to wrap around and inside her, and judging by Higgs' expression, he was experiencing it also. With no hesitation, she leaned forward while taking care to keep their wounds pressed together and brought her lips to his. 

Higgs let out a soft moan and moved his free hand behind her head as he pressed into her kiss, returning it with a growing desire. 

The strand grew stronger with the added embrace and as both Higgs and Sadie felt it increase in... Well, 'Power' was the only word to describe it.... Sadie fought to stay asleep a little longer. 

The kiss slowly ended and, as the two moved apart, only an inch separating them, Higgs touched his forehead to hers and squeezed their hands tighter together. "Thank you.... You're the only strand I've ever... ever..." his eyes filled with tears. " o-our strand is strong, Sadie. I... don't want to let go of you but... It'll sound strange but I swear I can see through you." 

"I'm waking up then. Higgs, I'll be back in less than 15 hours. I wonder if we can feel each other through our Strand even though I'm.... I'm so far from here..." 

"I'm sure we will. The powerful bond of a Strand is limitless." Higgs then murmured, "Stand up...." 

Sadie got to her feet and watched as Higgs tried to stand as well. He was beyond shaky and almost fell back down a few times but denied her help. "I was once the Particle of God. I need to do this on my own." He sadly chuckled. 

Once he found his footing, he slowly took the step needed to be right in front of Sadie. He gazed down at her as he cradled her face in his hands. "Hold me, Sadie." Higgs whispered and she put her arms around him, holding him close. 

"Hey..." She heard his whisper and when she looked up, he brought his lips down to meet hers, where they kissed until she faded away. 

Sadie woke in her bed and just blinked. "Was that... real?" Lightly shaking from her now induced worry, she slowly raised her hand which Higgs had cut - and felt the tears fill her eyes as she stared dumbly at her palm. "Fuck....." 

  
_The cut was there._   
It had really happened. 

It was only 8 in the morning and all she wanted to do was go back to sleep to be with him again. 

Life was already getting in the way of her and Higgs. 

As his name came to her mind, she felt a light tug inside her body, pulling her - and as she burst out sobbing, she knew precisely what she was feeling. 

It was their Strand.


	3. Figuring things out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Real vs Corporeal
> 
> Body vs Spirt
> 
> Here vs There

  
The day felt like it had gone on and on and on for years. Sadie spent a little of the time at a local drug store checking labels on different sleep aids, and she finally decided on Melatonin. Granted, she didn't want to get overly dependent on any sleep aid, but she also wanted all the time she could get with Higgs.

Despite the very real cut on her palm and the tug she felt when ever she thought of Higgs, she still had the notion that it HAD to be just a vivid dream. Amazing shit like what was going on never happened to her. She was always on the outside, living in the land of 'Wish that was me.'

But the cut was irrefutably THERE. Higgs had done it himself. They had kissed, held each other, their very souls had seemed to caress each other each time their eyes had met.

Once home from the drug store, Sadie hopped online to look into potential ways to stay permanently with Higgs. Or bring Higgs to her. She was unable to find any realistic means of doing so. A lot of it consisted of idiotic bullshit (spin in a circle counterclockwise and burn sage and.... Okay. Surrrrrre). Two things stood out to her despite there being a dead end to today's research but she still got lost in the thought and vowed to ask Higgs about it. If she could _feel_ the pull while awake, did that mean she could somehow _follow_ it to him while awake? And, in a darker vein, if she cut the AP cord connecting her astral self to her real self while she was with Higgs, would she remain with him forever? Sadie decided to research it all the next day to pass time. 

* * *

  
By the time the Melatonin finally pushed her into sleep, Sadie was excited to be back in Higgs' arms again. She wasn't able to focus all day because of it. She felt beyond complete with him despite the fact they'd only spent a few hours together on his Beach and most of it was Higgs apologizing for his horrific deeds of long ago. 

She kept glancing at her palm every few minutes and was always hyper aware of the cut which had created and sealed their Strand bond. It wasn't deep enough to require stitches, but it was definitely there and a constant reminder of their Strand.

She absolutely loved Higgs Monaghan with all her Being. Somehow she'd find the way to permanently be on his Beach with him. 

She was sure of it.

As she finally drifted off to sleep, she felt the tug once more. This time she focused on it and thought of Higgs. 

The feeling intensified and suddenly...

Sadie was floating in a void with nothing but blackness all around her. 

  
"HIGGS!" she called out. Her voice echoed throughout the void, but there was no response.

Her eyes, accustomed to always seeing _SOME_ thing, were beginning to make her brain hurt in a way she'd never felt before. The brain obviously couldn't comprehend a true nothing. Even in the darkness of sleep there were dreams, probably super fast flashes of some kind of light... She wasn't sure, but this darkness around here wasn't darkness. It transcended darkness. It was the darkness that darkness had. 

Sadie felt her chest tighten up as she experienced the darkness. It wasn't in a way she could describe, either. The feeling of the darkness was (yet wasn't at all) physical, mental, emotional and also nothing. 

_'you can't have him'_

The voice (thought? feeling? emotion?) flowed all over Sadie, penetrating her body, her mind, her cells, her atoms, embracing her, infiltrating her, crushing her, _fucking_ her essence toward compliance

_'he is mine'_

Eyes growing huge - if her eyes were even open; Sadie had no idea any longer - her blood ran cold at the pure vitriol in the voice... thought... whatever it was. It sounded female, male, both, neither, all. It was alive yet dead, but there was no confusion regarding how nightmarish and revolting it was. Whomever - whatever - was speaking consisted of nothing more or less than pure vile loathing of Sadie. 

_'you can't have him. he is mine. You can't have him. He is mine. You can't have him he is mine. You can't have him heismine youcanthavehimheismine_ YOUCANTHAVEHIMHEISMINEYOUCANT  
**YOUCANTMINEMINEMINEMINEMI--** ' 

"HIGGS!" Sadie screamed with every ounce of need she had within her, visualizing his face, feeling his arms around her, hearing his voice, tasting his kisses, smelling his scent. Her terror was overpowering, excruciating, and she needed him she needed him SHE NEEDED HIM HIGGSHIGGSHIGGGGGGGGS

.. nothing... 

...... silence..... 

And with a deafening roar of wind, Sadie woke up on her back, feeling the sand under her.

She screamed Higgs' name again and again and again, her body thrashing and twisting in the sand as she was still caught up in the now fading darkness. 

"Sadie!" She heard Higgs' panicked shout in return and not soon enough felt his arms wrapping around her. 

"Higgs... !" She frantically whispered, hugging him back with all her might. It was all too much and, now that she was safe and he was HERE, Sadie let violent tears of relief take over. 

"Hey! Hey..... Sadie?.. _Sadie_... I'm here, I'm _here_...what happened?" He consoled, holding her face in his hands and looking into her eyes, extremely worried by her reaction. She was shaking uncontrollably, looked terrified - and even Higgs knew that wasn't exactly how someone was to act when returning to someone they (loved) cared about.

"I'm here now? _Am_ I?" she hoarsely asked, tears streaming down her face, fingers digging into his back as if he would float away at any moment. 

"Yes...yes you are." The man murmured as he gently picked her up in his arms and started walking down the beach. "Sadie... What happened?" 

It took her a few minutes.

"I... I don't know. I think I saw... something. It was darker than dark. It was nothing. All around me. Just nothingness. It was in my head and out of my head, Higgs. It was in my head and it wanted you." 

"What do you mean?" 

"It. she.. he... they.. no one... everyone... said you were hers. His..i couldn't tell what or who.. It said you belonged to it and that I couldn't have you. That I couldn't have you. _That I couldn't have you..."_

"Shhh, shhh...." Higgs comforted Sadie, knowing full well how panic felt. He'd suffered more panic attacks than he cared to admit to once the reality of his eternal exile sank in. He continued calming Sadie's terrors until finally arriving where he wanted to bring them. It was a shallow cave that didn't go back too far but offered a safe haven from the storms that would hit occasionally. He used to take refuge there when he'd first been exiled, but over time he gave up. 

It didn't matter. Nothing had mattered. 

But now everything mattered. He wasn't alone any more. 

* * *

Gently Higgs sat down, Sadie still in his arms, and he held her in his lap tight against himself. "Tell me everything, Sadie."

She did the best she could though it was beyond difficult trying to explain how nothing being everything and everything being nothing actually felt. 

"Sounds similar to the Seam..." Higgs mused as he gently rubbed Sadie's back. "Weightless, comforting yet discomforting, everything is around yet nothing is around simultaneously. I'm wondering if you _were_ in the Seam..." His voice trailed off. 

Looking up at Higgs, Sadie softly asked, "Tell me about the Seam?" She knew of it from the game but there could be more or less to it. Hideo didn't know absolutely everything after all. She shuddered as she recalled the BT's she'd seen. 

"How to describe it.... It's like the Beach but where the Ha - our physical bodies - rejoins with the Ka - our souls - so we can repatriate back to the living world. We can stay on our Beach until we choose to move on to the other side - then our Ha would cease to exist and our Ka is what moves on - or we can choose to go back to the living world. I can't do any of that any longer. Was exiled here forever."

"I know. That's why I'm here." She gently touched his cheek. "So which part of you is here right now?"

"Both. That's why I can't return to the living world or move on. Same as those in the living world. They have their Ka and Ha. Only upon death are the two split. Separated. Since I'm forever imprisoned here...." Higgs gave a small shrug.

Sadie mused aloud. "So for me, it must mean my Ka is here with you since my body... My Ha.... Is back home sleeping in my bed." She met Higgs' eyes when he shook his head.

"That can't be right. If you were just your Ka, you'd not be as you are right now. I'd not be able to touch you, hold you... Kiss you... I could only see a slight blur of something - if I saw it at all. Tell me how you get here."

Sadie explained AP to Higgs and was grateful he understood it, and he DID - except for one thing. "You said you're definitely sleeping in your bed world's away from my own here. Yet I'm able to," He gave Sadie a long kiss, "do that. And I'm holding you. AND, most importantly, I cut your hand and we did the blood bond creating a strong Strand. NO Ka anywhere can do any of that. Not even a miniscule amount of it. Sadie." Higgs held her eyes deeply. "It's not your Ka that's here. It's not your Ha that's here. It's all of you that's here. It's _ALL_ of you."

Sadie's eyes widened in shock. "Then... then how am I able to move back and forth from here to there..."

"That I'm not sure on. And I wish I knew the answers." Higgs softly admitted. "But if you're able to do so, _please_ do it."

"I-I'm not sure I can figure it out either. All my net searches - our net is like the Chiral Network here but far far more extensive in many ways - haven't been very helpful but maybe I'm doing it wrong. Not using the right search terms. Ugh if only I could talk with Heartman or Målingen and Lockne. They're like half in the world of the living and half in the world of the dead. Extremely smart. They developed the Chiral Network. And Heartman visits the Beach many times a day. He's super knowledgeable. Fuck, they could help so much."

"What plans do you have, Sadie?" Higgs gently asked and she held him close. "I either will stay here permanently with you or find some way to bring you permanently back with me."

Higgs was quiet for a moment as he went over what I'd just said then let out a little thoughtful hum. "I'd not turn down either of those scenarios. If anyone had asked me before I met you if I'd willingly stay here I would've destroyed them. But now? I'd choose having you here with me instead of me returning with you."

"Aren't you tired of here, though?" Sadie asked as her brows drew together in confusion.

"Was. _Hell_ yeah. Ain't nothin' great about bein' alone for all of time, darlin'. But now that you're in my life, I have to admit that eternity with you sounds a hell of a lot better than a few short decades with you."


	4. Ponderings and perhaps some help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone somewhere knows something.  
> And somebody sometimes knows someway   
> To somehow help in somewhat of a way. 
> 
> ....😏  
>  E. I. E. I. O
> 
> (Best bullshit summary ever on ao3. Means absolutely nothing for this chapter yet means everything for this chapter. 
> 
> Except the eieio shit.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I never have planned a thing with this.   
> Its just growing.   
> Hope folks are enjoying this because it's growing on me and I'm having a blast writing it. ❤️

They passed some time in an amicable quietness, Sadie taking in the melancholic drabness of the Beach from the mouth of the cave. The lack of any color was disheartening and depressing. But this _was_ Higgs' eternal prison. She let out a heavy sigh as she pondered how to get some color to the place. But it wasn't like she could project with a bunch of paint and shit. Even Sam and Fragile couldn't bring anything with them but themselves when they'd use Beaches to jump. 

"Maybe i could smuggle some markers in via my cookie..." She muttered, then let out a bark of laughter (plus winced in pain) at the idea. She'd never do well smuggling a thing into an actual Earth prison and sadly, it was the same here. 

"You.....don't wanna know...." She winked at Higgs, who had glanced over to her when she'd let out the laugh. He nodded, blew her a kiss and resumed what ever he'd been doing. 

A couple minutes later, Higgs looked up as if he had just stumbled across the answer. "I've been thinkin' about how you're able to come and go as you please. Maybe there's some sort of portal or something here. It's the only thing I can think of that would explain it."

"A portal?" Sadie eyeballed him. "Naw. It's just Astral Projection. But I can only get here when I sleep. It's - "

"Hear me out, darlin." Higgs shushed her with a gentle kiss. "You said AP is the astral body leaving the physical body. So in a sense it IS the Ka leaving the Ha. But since it's obviously not that way for you, then you're not truly Astral Projecting. I feel our Strand tug between us constantly, Sadie. Since you can only come to me when you sleep, I assume you only feel it once you're asleep. So - "

It was Sadie's turn to interrupt him. "I feel it constantly also, Higgs. Like, 24/7 feel it. Even though it's only been two nights since I found you. But it's constantly on and gets more pursuading as the day passes. As if it grows more urgent to force me to heed it. But I can't do shit about it until I sleep. An awake fully bodied person isn't _supposed_ to warp through time and alternate universes. An astral body can. But not a full bodied body."

"So let me make sure I'm fully comprehending this. What you're sayin' is that your physical body is wanting to heed the Strand pull to me but can't, and the supposed astral projection pulls you right to me with no issues."

"Well yeah, Higgs. That's exactly what I'm saying. There's still no answers, though. And I'm too scared to let my physical body heed the pull while I'm awake. What if I die or get lost or..or crushed between some fucked up one dimensional plane or.. I don't even know. End up in that black void of malevolent hate forever? I'm terrified to lose you, Higgs. I want everything with you. I don't know what to do. Fuck I wish I could contact Heartman and get him here to this Beach."

He looked down at the ground for a moment in thought before looking out of the cave mouth toward the sky. "We need to find a way to get you - all of you - permanently here. I don't want to lose you. I WON'T lose you."

Sadie hugged him close, feeling the warmth of his skin against hers. "I don't want to lose you either, Higgs. But I also can't just stay asleep forever just to be with you, much as I want to. What can we do?"

"We'll figure it out. We have all the time in the world." Was his reassuring reply as he traced his finger down her jawline. 

Sadie took in a breath and sadly studied Higgs, her eyes welling up with tears as she quietly reminded him, "YOU have all the time in the world. I do not."

He looked down at her, his eyes shining with a mixture of emotions. He held her tightly and whispered, "We'll find a way. I promise. Maybe if you start mentally calling out to Heartman like you did to me, perhaps he'll hear you and come to investigate? It's worth a try and.... You're already here in our world so it's not like it'll take you years to find him. He's just across the.... whatever separates the Beach from the real world."

Sadie backed off him and just stared, her jaw to the floor until Higgs got out, "... Bad idea?"

"Bad ide - NO YOU FUCKING GENIUS. I BET IT'LL WORK." Sadie absolutely crowed, before a huge grin covered her face and she launched onto Higgs, knocking him back as she gave him a huge kiss.

"So I guess that's a yes?" Higgs asked, a huge smile on his face.

  
"Of _course_ it's a yes! It's a _hell yes_!" she laughed, kissing him again.

  
"Alright then." Higgs chuckled, then let out a yawn. "I guess we should get some sleep now. We've got a long day ahead of us."

  
"Mhmm," she hummed in agreement, snuggling into his chest as his arms tightened around her. "You are amazing, Higgs. But if I sleep here, I'll probably head back into my body. Or whatever's on my bed at home. That's such a disturbing idea.... What if nothing's there? I'm just there one second and poof, gone the next, then bam I'm back... "

"Well if you're not _there_ then obviously all of you is _here_." Higgs pointed out with a grin. "Hopefully Heartman can figure out how to sever you from your bed-link and make it so you stay here."

"Hopefully he'll WANT to help...." Sadie sobered up. "He doesn't exactly... like you.... So doing me this favor to help you be happy could.... um.... not..."

"Shhhhhhh, Shhhhhhh. None of that negative talk, darlin. All he has to do is look at your pretty little face and see the hope in your eyes and I'm sure he'll help - if anything, for you." Higgs murmured as he gently stroked the hair on the side of her head. "May as well start calling for him now, sweetheart."

"I'm already ahead of you on that one. Been doing so since you suggested it, Higgs. I haven't stopped calling for him since you brought it up."

"Good girl." Higgs softly purred as sat up and brought his lips to hers, holding her close and protectively against him. 

"Mmmm..." she moaned into his mouth, her arms snaking around his neck as she returned his sweet kiss. Finally Higgs reluctantly broke the embrace and smiled at her as he lied back again, holding her close to him as she got comfy atop him. "Sweet dreams, darlin."

  
"You too, Higgs. And if I'm not here when you wake, I'll be back soon as I sleep in the Real. Though.... " Her voice trailed away and Higgs prompted, "What?" 

"Though my world doesn't seem as real as this one does. I feel more at home when I'm here with you than I do there. There is just me being a tiny miniscule speck on a planet with 7.3 billion people and -" 

**"7.3 BILLION???!"**

Sadie jumped a foot with Higgs' sudden outburst but he caught her easily before she could topple off him. "Sorry... just.... 7.3 _billion_? The _hell_ do they all even _fit?_!"   
  
"Wellllll if it's not a certain city in China or the Phillipines where folks are packed in like sardines with each house literally touching each house, then it's still do able. Plenty of open land everywhere to plant crops, build stuff. And so on. Like there's only 57,000 people in my small town."

"Sweetheart?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Um, ' _small town'_ and ' _50 thousand_ ' don't belong in the same sentence." 

"Maybe not here in Death Stranding-vile, but my world, 50k is _small_. There's some cities with millions of people. And there's millions of different sized cities and..... And I'm breaking your brain. Oh dear. You're gonna absolutely start drooling from brain-shock in a moment. Oh _Higgs_....."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's short this time but I'm still writing the next chapter so no worries. :)


	5. My Fair Lady

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No summary.
> 
> Short but ohhhhhh......

Higgs woke up to find Sadie gone as they'd expected would happen. He grimaced and decided he never wanted to wake without her in his arms. It sucked waking up alone and going throughout the day being alone. He loathed 'alone' and didn't want nor need it at all.

With a good stretch, Higgs stood and got ready for the day. The same old boring and dull day of an eternal beach that never stopped ebbing and flowing. Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth....

  
If only he had even just a paltry level 4 DOOMS. He'd fix up the Beach for Sadie. Make it full of color, of _life_. Somewhere to call 'home' where they could sleep comfortably instead of in sand or on the hard and unforgiving cave floor. Comfy places to sit instead of sand...or the hard unforgiving cave fucking floor. 

Higgs sighed a long, deep, sad sigh. He'd never given a shit about his life much less on the fucking Beach prison until now. Until Sadie. 

Hopping up on a boulder to sit and watch the waves, the man tried to figure out how much time passed on his Beach versus how much passed in Sadie's world. Was his time faster? Slower? Ran in tandem? 

Was Heartman even still _alive_ at this point? 

Higgs shivered at the awful possibility that the man very well could be. Having no clue how much time had passed in the living world, the ex-terrorist was lost without a map. Maybe five hundred years had passed. Maybe five.

Higgs scratched the back of his neck and gazed out across the ocean - and froze. Walking toward him, vibrant and obvious giving the colorless scenery, was a bright red dress. 

_Amelie_. 

"Oh fuck no." Higgs whispered, eyes widening in a horror he would have never felt before his exile. Normally he'd run to her and fall to his knees. But not now. Not ever. He slid off the rock and started walking backward, never taking his eyes off of the approaching Extinction Entity. 

"Stay away. Leave me alone." Higgs frantically whispered. 

"Is that how you treat an old ally?" He clearly heard as if she were right next to him and not standing still on the water far out. "What has happened to you, my sweet Higgs? You used to be so happy to see me. Ready to do my every bidding. Now you wish to run from me as if I were your insurmountable nemesis. This hurts me deeply, Higgs. I can return all which I gave you if you just ask."

"You stripped me of it when I needed it the most, Amelie." Her name was spat out with pure contempt. "You failed me at the wrong time - unless that was your plan. Used me until you got what - who - you actually wanted. I need nothing from you. Do you hear me? _Nothing_!" 

There was silence for so long that Higgs figured she'd left (good fucking riddance) but then she spoke again, this time standing right behind him. "I regret to this day that I had to do that, Higgs." 

If she was expecting him to turn, she had another think coming. Higgs just stayed where he was, hands clenched into fists so tight that his nails dug moon-shaped crescents into his palm, all the while staring daggers into the ocean now tainted by _her_ presence. . 

"Leave. My. Beach." He gritted out in a low, dangerous voice. "Now."

"Higgs, I took the power from you because I couldn't risk you harming Sam. He had a very special role he needed to finish." 

"And I didnt?" 

"You did. And you still do." 

"No. Absolutely not, Amelie. I'm done with your fucking games. Choose some other sap to play. I'm out." 

Another silence filled the air and, as Higgs saw Amelie far out in the water again, she gazed right at him and he heard her voice in his head. 

"Sadie's a lovely girl. I'm glad you've found each other to stave off your loneliness, Higgs. I've heard astral traveling can be dangerous - even deadly - if things go wrong. I hope she'll be safe and secure."

"Don't you dare _fucking_ do anything to Sadie. I'm finally happy and whole and -" 

"Didn't I make you happier and complete, Higgs? I gave you so much that no other could ever give you. I loved you then and I love you now." 

"No. NO. Leave Sadie and I alone, Amelie." Higgs snarled. "I'm NOT playing any more of your bullshit games. I'm _never_ going to come walking - or crawling - back to you. I _won't_. Forget about me, because I've permanently forgotten about you."

All he heard was a soft voice singing "London Bridge is Falling Down. My.... Fair.... Lady...." 

She was gone then. 

Higgs fell to his knees, whole body shaking uncontrollably as sobs wracked his body. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate her.


	6. Switching sides: A temporary reprieve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Many new things are experienced.

  
Higgs didn't know how long he stayed there on the sand, but when he got up, his mind was made up. 

He had to get out of here. 

He had to get away from all this. 

He had to go somewhere safe with people who loved and cared for him. 

Sadie.

He had to get to her. 

Higgs didn't know _how_ he was going to do it, but he was determined to get out of this place. 

And this time, the gods willing, he wasn't coming back. The stakes were too high now that Amelie knew of Sadie. Fucking bitch.

Amelia, not Sadie. 

Always fucking Amelie. 

Higgs had to get away. 

He had to leave this fucking Beach and never come back. 

No matter if it hurt him in some way or the other... 

Sadie's safety was more important than his own pain. 

Higgs knew he could do it. He had to do it. There was no room for failure. 

He wasn't sure exactly how it was done, so he focused on an inate instinct deep within him. He grabbed their Strand with his Ka, got a good, tight resistance on it, and he jumped. It was the only thing which sounded right.

* * *

Loud. 

It was _loud_. 

Strange noises. 

Higgs' eyes shot open and he jerked up into a sitting position, gasping hard as he looked around frantically. He was in some kind of room with lights shining off a wall, apparently from the outside. It was very obviously late in the day (or so he figured, since Sadie had left his Beach not too long ago) and slowly Higgs rose.

Looking around the room, he saw a desk, a chair, a bookcase above a bed, something flat on the desk that was lit up and.... had his face on it. He walked over and touched it and, when he saw the keyboard sitting in front of the screen, he realized it was like his old world laptop in his bunker. This looked new, however. His eyes roamed to the shelves above the screen and he smiled as he saw a photo of Sadie with another female. He curiously took in the buildings behind them - so tall they didn't fit the photo. 

Interesting. 

Turning from the computer desk, Higgs took in a small pile of clothing and went to it, recognizing the shirt Sadie had worn earlier and he smiled. He made it. Somehow he actually MADE it to Sadie. 

Eyeballing the bed, he shrugged and parked himself on it after perusing her bookshelf and finding a seemingly interesting one on something called "Paranormal Studies." He'd thumbed through it, then set it on the small table next to the bed. He'd read it later.

Right now, though, he was tired from his travel. He laid back and closed his eyes, and within moments he was fast asleep.

Higgs didn't know how long he slept, but he woke to the sound of the door opening. He sat up quickly as Sadie walked in, a bag in her hand as she was staring intently at something flat in her other hand.

"Sadie MacLeod. I traveled a lonnnng way to get to you, kitten... " he drawled with a smirk on his face.

She let out a shocked cry, spun toward her bed as she dropped her bag plus the object she was holding and stared at him for a few moments. Higgs winked - and Sadie cried out his name, took two running strides across the room and dove onto the bed, straddling him and kissing him deeply between gasping, "How? Higgs, how??"

Explanations could wait. His arms went around her tightly and he returned her kisses with the same passion, alternating between running fingers through her hair, pressing her lips harder against his own, and holding her close as possible.

When she finally raised her head, Sadie just stared down at him, her eyes filled with tears, and she got out, "You're here. You're actually here! How?"

"Followed our Strand, Darlin' and hoped I'd done it right. Apparently, I did." Was Higgs' gentle reply as he smiled at her. "Your bed is the most comfortable thing I've ever lied on, by the way."

Sadie was in awe. Higgs Monaghan was in her _room_ , on her _bed._... god DAMN. Of course her mind right away went to an amazing fanfic she'd read which made mention that Higgs (and everyone else in the Stranding world) had never seen the stars or the sun rise or set since the Chiral clouds had fully blocked it all. She asked Higgs about it and he verified the information.

So that's how Higgs found himself outside. It was still a good 45 minutes before sunset time, Sadie had said, so she decided they'd take a ride in her vehicle to a perfect place to have an unblocked view of the sunset and the stars.

Higgs was looking forward to it all. All he'd ever done was imagine how it looked like and, despite seeing pictures in old world books, he figured the real deal _had_ to be better. 

Sadie lived in what she called a "small town". To Higgs, whose mouth was incapable of closing as they drove through it, the place was not a "small town" but a colossal world of its own. So many people. So many vehicles. The roads were pristine as were the buildings. So many buildings offering things he'd never heard of.

And it was so fucking _loud_.  
Everything was _LOUD_.

Sadie had to laugh to herself. The Particle of God which Permeates all Existance couldn't stop his head from swiveling all over, trying to take in everything he could and asking a billion questions like a 2 year old would. She was holding his hand and raised it to her lips, happy to answer and explain everything to the best of her knowledge.

They both found out Higgs really _really_ liked Quarter Pounders with Cheese and strawberry McShakes from McDonald's. Sadie vowed to let him try as many foods and drinks as possible. 

But the absolute best moments were when, as they were sitting on the hood of Sadie's car and the setting sun began displaying its dance of color across the sky, Higgs pulled her close and whispered, "Oh shit....oh my fucking shit..... It's way more beautiful than I ever thought it'd be..."

Higgs could not look away if he even had to. The colors. The sky. The magic. The absolute beauty. 

He didn't even realize he had some tears rolling down his cheeks. 

Once the sun had gone down past the horizon, he turned to Sadie, opened his mouth to say something - anything - and just pulled her close into the longest kiss they'd shared yet. When Sadie moved her lips back slightly, their eyes just locked together and Higgs reached up, caressing her cheek. "Sadie... that was...." He touched his forehead to hers and she cradled his face in her hands. "That's one half of the beauty tonight, my Higgs....", she whispered, "Close your eyes."

He did, fully trusting her, and she kissed his lips and murmured, "Lie back with me, Higgs. Keep your face straight ahead of you so you'll see the sky.... Few more moments.... okay," she so softly whispered. "Open your eyes, Higgs." 

He slowly did.   
He blinked.   
Blinked again. 

".... _oh_..." was all he could say as he just lost himself, staring as his eyes moved all over the dark sky littered with stars. 

Tears were pouring out of his eyes now. He reached up a hand as if he could grab one and keep it close to him forever.

He squeezed Sadie's hand as his emotions flowed out of him. "I never...... Sadie.... I...." 

"I know, Higgs." Was her loving reply as she squeezed his hand back. "It's okay. Let it all out." She moved as close to him as possible and let her head rest against his own as Higgs slipped his arm under her neck. 

They stayed like that all night. Higgs never once took his eyes from the sky. Not once. 

Sadie was glad no mosquitoes were out. She sent a silent ' _thank you_ ' to them for not ruining this single most important night Higgs would ever have. 

  
When dawn was about to begin, Sadie took Higgs to the back of the car and had him sit on it with her. As the sun started to rise, Higgs again was struck dumb, unable to speak a single word. Despite the sun's brightness, he never looked away once. 

"Ugh, I hate to say  it but it's over until dusk tonight." Sadie gently said once the sun had gotten high enough. "We can definitely come back if you'd like to. I bet I could borrow my friends telescope so you can see the stars super close. Most stars are millions upon millions of light years away. Their light has taken from a few years to thousands of years to reach us, so we're seeing starlight that's that old. It's the only way we can literally see the past in the current time." 

Higgs turned his head and looked at Sadie, tears beginning to stream down his face again. " _Thank_ you, Sadie," he said as she wiped his tears away with her fingers and kissed more than a few away. "I definitely need to see all of this again. As much as I can. I wouldn't ever want to get used to it." 

"You're very welcome, Higgs." Sadie smiled. "I'm so glad you enjoyed it."

They got back into the car and drove off to the main road, Higgs never once letting Sadie's hand go.

"When we come out here tonight, I want to show you the moon in greater detail and maybe some of the other planets." Sadie said as they got back on the road. "I really want to show you Mars. There's something about it. I believe water has been found on it and NASA - the Space program here that sends up rockets, took men to the moon and so on - seriously wants to see if it'd be viable to colonize it some day."

Higgs just stared at her, finally saying, "Living on Mars?"

"Yup. Probably will happen after I die but I'm glad my future generation will be able to do so. Heck, maybe my own kids and their kids someday. If I have kids that is."

Higgs quietly gazed at Sadie, reaching over to lightly run a finger tip down the side of her face. "Perhaps someday." 

She glanced at him and saw nothing but tenderness in his eyes and it warmed her heart. "You ever thought about having kids?" 

"Before? No. My upbringing was horrific, and then with the whole Death Stranding happening, there was no reason. Also no one really had kids any longer. Not really. I guess a few did, but many felt it wasn't safe because of the VoidOuts, BT's and Timefall. It's a rough world for adults, much less defenseless babies and children. Now, however?" He snuck a quick glance at Sadie, "There are a lot more possibilities of a great and safe future for kids. I guess if it was to be, I'd be scared as hell but I'd fully embrace it."

  
Sadie met Higgs' eyes and gave him a smile. "Want to go get something for breakfast and then get some sleep?"

"Sure." He nodded and just gazed at her. Sadie glanced at him, grinned and asked, "What? Do I have a booger hanging out my nose or something?"

"Not at all." Higgs laughed. "You're just beautiful. Can't stop taking you in."

"Higgs, I seriously adore and appreciate the hell out of you. You're amazing." Sadie winked at him, then asked seriously, "How long do you think you can stay here?"

"Honestly?"

"Yup."

"I'm hoping for ever... " He drew quiet for a few moments before softly saying, "I - I know whose voice you heard when you were in the blackness." 

"Really? They were so ridiculously malevolent. Who is it?" 

Higgs took a deep breath and said, "Amelie." 

Sadie pulled the car over, stopped and turned to him, her eyes wide in horror. "What?" She whispered, the fear very apparent in her question. 

"She knows about you. By name. I... had to get here. Perhaps she won't get to us here. She's locked to that world as far as I know. She - she tried to entice me back to her. Wanted to give me my powers back and said my job isn't done yet." 

Sadie was quiet for a moment, then let out a strong, "Mother fucking god damned _cunt_. I swear to GOD, Higgs, if you get hypnotized by her again and join her, I love you so _fucking_ much that I'll put you out of your misery personally." 

She held his shocked eyes until her own blurred severely and she broke down sobbing hard. Higgs took off his seat belt and pulled her close." **NEVER**. I'll never fucking go back to her lies and bullshit and I _told_ her that. She can fuck off. I _never_ want to see or hear her again." He gently took hold of Sadie's chin, tenderly turned her face toward him and wiped her tears. "YOU are the one I want. The one I need. The one who makes me whole. And Sadie, you're the one I love." 

Their lips met in a deep kiss but this time there was another element to it. 

Desire and need. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be very light smut.
> 
> Smut-ette.  
> Smut-ish  
> Imagination-smut  
> Hints-o-Smut
> 
> Believe me, I'll do a stand alone which will be under that explicit tag.


	7. Awkward Explanations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Troy Baker, by name, makes an appearace.
> 
> Explanations are given. 
> 
> Worries are had and reassurances are made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mkay. So smut must wait til next chapter.  
> You know how you're writing and you truly believe you know how it's going to go and then one of your characters decides "Nice story but no, this is going to happen instead" and your whole planned chapter is hijacked?
> 
> Yeah. That just happened and by a character I didn't even plan for or know even existed til this chapter. 
> 
> Well. Here is chapter 7.  
> Shrugs.

Back at Sadie's home, she gave Higgs a tour. "I know it's a big home for one person - it has 3 bedrooms, one and a half baths and a full basement," she explained, "but I got it a lot cheaper than my budget was allowing for and the mortgage is lower than I'd expected it to be."

Higgs nodded as he pretended he knew what she was talking about. His eyes traveled around the room she'd called a "living room" and then they stopped and moved back to a huge screen against a wall. "What's that?"

"Huh? Oh, that's my TV. I got it for the big screen to watch movies on." 

"Movies?" 

"Yeah, you know those things they used to show in theaters before the world went to hell? I have a whole collection on DVD, Blu-ray and even a few on VHS." 

Higgs' eyes lit up. "Yeah... my.... dad had some movies he'd watch. They were on a - can't remember what it was called, it was so long ago and I've pushed a lot of that time out of my brain. Thin circular disks..."

"That's a DVD, then." Sadie smiled warmly. "We'll have to cuddle on the couch and watch a few movies some evening."

"I'd like that." Was Higgs' gentle reply as he hooked his little finger around her own.

She showed him the rest of her home but the one area which made his eyes open wide was in her basement. It was cozily and very invitingly furnished, but it was also a literal Death Stranding world.

Sadie had collected every thing possible that had to do with the game, from posters to the collectors edition with the plastic BB and full sized cargo container, to pins, stickers, tee shirts, hats, hoodie, etc. Etsy had been a _HUGE_ aid in her finding the most stunning hand made items and she was SO grateful for the talented shopkeepers who put so much love and care into their creations. Sadie even had a working Odradek which lit up via batteries, Higgs' outfit for Cosplay (which she didn't do; she just needed to have it) and, the one object which Higgs was holding in his hands and carefully studying - a 3D printed game-correct copy of his Golden Mask.

Higgs was in awe and, as he held it to his face a few times, he heard Sadie say, "People can create a lot of things now with 3D printers. Even body organs which work."

Higgs' eyes moved to her then back to 'his' mask. With a little "Huh", he returned it to the shelf, walked over and thoroughly checked out 'his' clothing and armor and then turned to Sadie.

"So which item here is your favorite?" He grinned "Better be the replica of my mask. I was always fond of it."

"My favorite in this room USED to be your mask, but," she walked over to him and drew him in closely, placing a kiss on his soft lips, "now it's very obviously you."

"I _am_ the most authentic." He murmured against her lips between soft kisses.

"Agreed" Sadie as she ran her hand up and down his back. They resumed their embrace until they were shocked out of it by a loud gasp.

Turning, Sadie found herself looking at the confused eyes of her best friend, Jessica, whose jaw dropped when she took in Higgs.

Her eyes moved between the two before she got out, "Jesus _CHRIST_ , Sadie..... A-are you _seriously_ making out with TROY BAKER in your fucking BASEMENT?!"

She blinked, took a step forward, clenched her eyes shut, reopened them and a grin formed on her face. "Oh my GOD. Troy, I've been a fan of yours for _ages_ now! _Please_ do the Joel voice. He's my favorite character. I LOVE 'The Last of Us' so much. Part two was my ultimate favorite though. I just.... just..... SADIE YOU GOT TROY FUCKING BAKER IN YOUR BASEMENT!"

"He's not Troy....." Sadie softly said as Higgs asked, "Who the hell is Troy?"

Jessica chuckled as she walked over to a comfy chair and plopped into it, a leg over then arm of the chair, just happily staring at Higgs. "Stop bullshitting, you guys. _Obviously_ you're Troy - wait, I thought you've been married for a decade - _and_ you have the same voice you used for Higgs. C'mon, Troy. If you're worried, don't be. I won't tell a soul you were here as long as I get an autograph. Oh my GOD, SADIE. _REALLY_?!?! "

"I'm not......." Higgs started to say before Sadie gently interrupted him.

"Jess...he's seriously not Troy." She softly said as she tightened her arm around Higgs, who muttered, "Who the fuck is Troy Baker?" 

"You're serious?" Jess blinked. 

"Yes."

"Troy effing Baker is in your basement and you're telling me he's not TROY F'ING BAKER?!?!" Jess asked, her face the most puzzled thing Sadie and Higgs had ever seen on a Human face. "What... then he's a ridiculously perfect spot-on Cosplayer." Studying Higgs up and down, she winked at Sadie, "I'd definitely tap that..."

"Jess..." Sadie sighed and moved Higgs and herself to the couch across from the chair Jessica was camped in. Taking a deep breath she said, "He's not Troy. He's not a Cosplayer." Another deep breath before she met and held Jesse's eyes. "He's Higgs. The for real, 100% Higgs Monaghan in the flesh."

Jessica was dead silent - then burst out laughing. "Oh come ON, Sades. I'm not stupid. You don't expect me to actually believe he's -" 

Higgs turned an apologetic look to Sadie, "I, have a very small reserve of DOOMS left, but I'll need a lot of rest after this...." and he turned to Jessica. "I want you to watch." 

"Okay..." She agreed, smiling - and it faded fast when Higgs jumped behind her, bent to her ear and whispered, "The name's Higgs. Nice to meet you, darlin'..." and jumped back to the couch next to Sadie, eyes not leaving those of Jessica's. 

He gave her a small smile as only he could do. 

The young woman's eyes met Sadie's and she opened her mouth, tried to speak, closed it, opened it again and very audibly whispered, "My God... _How_?" 

"Long story..." Sadie softly said as Higgs put an arm around her and kissed her neck.

"My _God_..." Jessica whispered again, eyes moving between the two. "He's not gonna - not gonna destroy the world, is he?"

Higgs moved his lips from Sadie's neck, met Jess's eyes and replied, "Never. I learned a lot of lessons while exiled on my Beach."

"Okay." Jessica threw her hands up in the air. "I really need answers, Sadie. Yesterday. _Please_." She nearly begged. "Am I dreaming this?"

"Nope." Higgs and Sadie said in unison. "This is really happening." Higgs added with another small smile.

"Right... I need a drink." Jess got up and walked over to Sadie's small fridge she kept for snacks and drinks. "Anyone want anything?"

"Do I have any wine still in there?" Sadie called after her best friend.

"Sure do." She called back with a slightly shaking voice.

"Bring the bottle and glasses, please, Sis." Sadie added, glancing at Higgs who was looking real tired. "Want to go nap it off in my bed?" She gently offered but Higgs shook his head with a soft, "I won't risk waking without you with me." 

"I fully understand, Higgs." Was Sadie's reply as she softly kissed him. 

Jess came back, eyes never leaving Higgs, and she slowly sat back onto the chair and kept staring. "He.. you actually..." She numbly gestured from Higgs to behind her and back to the couch and Higgs nodded.

"B-but you're just a character in a game." She whispered, looking as if she was going to cry. "Games aren't real. They're... _games_. Created with _programs_. And _code_. You're," she pointed at Higgs, "You're _code_..." Moving her eyes to Sadie, she gave her a 'Please fucking explain..." look.

"He's right here, Jess." Sadie softly said and Jess looked at her. "He's right here and he's real. He has been since the day I finally found his Beach and him."

"But... But that's not possible..." She numbly shook her head. "You're lying. You _have_ to be lying. There's no way that... So you're telling me that silly Astral Projection actually worked?!"

"That's exactly what happened, Jess. I can't explain the how's or the why's any better than you - Or Higgs - can. All I know is that it worked, we made a strong Strand, and," she shrugged, "here we are. I was going to him every night while I slept, but he managed to get here last night."

"You made a strong Strand..." Jessica mused, still staring at the two in front of her, then her jaw dropped, "You mean the two of you _fucked_?! Jesus that's hot..."

"No," Sadie started laughing, "Not yet." She lovingly looked at Higgs who kissed her temple and then returned to Jess. "We did a blood bond." She and Higgs held up their hands and Jessica just shook her head. "Un-fucking-believable... Yet here you are."

"Here I am." Was Higg's reply.

Jess was silent before turning to Sadie. "Can you get me Sam?? Pleeeeeease?"

Sadie just burst out laughing.

* * *

After Jessica had left, more calm and understanding than when she'd arrived, and with the BFF promise to not tell a single fucking soul or Higgs would do Very Bad Things to her (he wouldn't ever), Higgs helped Sadie clean up - marveling over the dishwasher the entire time. 

"Are you still tired, Higgs?" Sadie gently asked him as she ran a finger down his jawline and he nodded with an apologetic look.

"I am, kitten. I was keeping that last miniscule drop of DOOMS for whatever reason. Using it after such a long time of _not_ using it has worn me out. I'm so scared to sleep, though. I don't want to go back to my Beach without you. But then again, I don't want to stay here and us grow old and die. It's the same dilemma I had before."

Sadie thought for a few moments and then offered," Maybe we won't be parted here. If you think about it, our Strand is literally curled up around us. There's nothing separating us and I'm not Astral. You're obviously not Astral. You might not be _able_ to get back to your Beach." She ran her hands down his chest while holding his now conflicted eyes.

"But I want eternity with you, Sadie. I _need_ eternity with you."

"You have eternity with me, Higgs. Love is eternal." Sadie warmly said with a loving smile.

He looked down at her and his eyes softened. He pulled her into his arms and hugged her tightly. "Then I do have you for eternity. "

They laid down next to each other and Sadie was asleep shortly after they'd shared a few deep kisses. Despite being ridiculously exhausted, Higgs stayed awake for a long time, holding her hand and watching her sleep.

"I'll stay here with you," he whispered to her, "I'll stay here. Where ever we end up, I just want and need you. Only you." He kissed the top of her head, gently pulled her over him and cradled her close as he drifted off, silently begging the universe to let them wake in each other's arms. 

  
Higgs didn't dream that night.

He woke up with Sadie curled into him and his arms wrapped around her. They were both still fully clothed with their shoes on, but that didn't matter to the man. He looked over at the clock and saw both the pointers were straight up. Having no clue what that meant, he gently kissed Sadie awake and she stretched a bit before smiling at him.

"Hi," she said softly, "How long have you been awake?"  
"A few moments." Was his soft answer. "I'm still here."   
"That's the best news a girl could ever wake up to." Sadie smiled and they stayed in each other's arms for a while before Sadie got up. "I need a shower and I'm sure you do as well."

"It would be nice." Was Higgs' reply and as she led him to the bathroom and showed him how to use the shower, adjust the temp and then got him a towel. As she turned to leave him to his shower, Higgs gently took her shoulders, leaned down, kissed the top of her ear and then whispered, "Want to join me, Kitten? I'll wash your back and make sure I get every single inch..."

Dear God was his voice erotic. Sadie let out a breath, felt tingles shoot down her neck and breathed out, "I... Yeah, Higgs." she turned and gave him a little shy smile. "I'd like that very much."

"Me too." Higgs replied as he brought his lips to her own, kissing her slowly but fully. He let his hands slowly move down her back until they got to the hem of her shirt, then he slowly pulled it up and over her head, letting it drop to the floor. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wild ride.
> 
> Comments, suggestions, critiques and love would be so appreciated. It's what keeps writers writing.


End file.
